I will tell them why the trees slumbered in a lullaby I will reveal to them how all tears have gone dry it was when you promulgated my verdict: “good bye”
It was still the sunshine’s reign as I recall like ‘twas but yesterday but before I can brace my self for that mortal dagger driven to my chest the chilling sun and the freezing moon started to sing a melancholic tune
Nurtured in the soft breeze’s caress and nourished in dew brought forth colors that are changing in hue for what seemed the start of a colorful show marked the end of the summer glow
what else is there to say but to let the light leave with the day and this darkness that had befall be there to stay while bells they toll
I will whisper its dismal moan to those in twigs still holding on oblivious to the truth that it won’t last for long
I will whisper it to those caught in midair as they drift farther and farther away from their beloved they just left bare
I will whisper it atop the mounded heap which to earth did terminally cede
fool’s show it is indeed for the varied colors that abound speaks loudly of the end without a sound
Duty-bound I came to execute The verdict of Teresa On that appointed eve
Like a soft breeze Pounding the curtains I entered unseen As a pup she laid Duped that her Satin and laced sheets Would get her covered From the judgement That would befall her
Then braced myself did I To enforce her sentence Cold and swift
Arrow in hand Steadily aimed Dug deep in her skin
This I did Over and over again
Instead of her body Limped And eerily silent dead I heard Her forceful Muffled Shriek
As the steel bored deeper I heard a Slapping sound Squishing Steady Periodic
Was I amused Where the blade had been Not a trickle of blood Nothing did I see But it got more crimson Like ripe tomatoes Begging to be picked free
I turned to her face Contorted it was Her eyes blocked the faint light Mouth’s an open vessel Begging for the rain to trickle In the dead of the night
At some point in our lives as parents, we will lose our cool on our kids as there will be a lot of instances of them getting into our nerves. And referring to them as a “pain in the ass” is often an understatement. I myself pray for enough provision of patience everyday in order for me to remain rational and composed.
And then I thought of my kids’ teachers who have to deal with several occasional “pain-in-the-ass” kids, and not just mine. Yes, they chose to deal with them as their profession. But their commitment to show up every school day, all year round trying to mould them kids into intelligent and law-abiding citizens is unparalleled.
Our teachers deserve nothing less than a heartfelt ‘Thank You’ for that!
May our homes, circle of friends, work environment, and ourselves be healed of all the toxicity – caused by us.
Because sometimes, whether we like it or not, we are the main source of toxicity and misery of others. And we know we fucking need to get the fuck out of our toxic selves to heal and be a blessing instead.
♬ For he’s the jolly good fellow 3x ♪♪ ♪♪♪ Nobody can deny 3x ♬ (hit repeat to infinity…)
Alam kong hindi ka nainom pero sayang at hindi mo ako nadadamayan ngayon. Masarap pa naman yung dinala ni nanay dito na native na pabo, bagay na bagay sa Red Horse at mahaba-habang kwento.
Pero ayos lang tay, ganun talaga siguro. Nauna ka lang pero mga sandaang taon pa e susunod narin kami.
Marami sana akong tanong sayo tungkol sa pagiging ama. Nga pala, syempre pogi mga apo mo, mana sakin. Oops wag ka ng humirit boss, ako nalang buhay sa atin ngayon. Pero kung makakausap sana kita e tatanungin kita kung pano maging mabuting haligi ng tahanan. Gusto kong maging mabuting ama, ano pa nga bang pwede kong gawin para maging ganun ako?
Totoong marami akong pagkukulang pero ayaw ko namang manatiling nababanas nalang sa mga pagkukulang ko na iyon. Sa tulong ng Diyos e babangon at babangon ako. Mas astig. Mas mabuting ama at kabiyak. Mas mabuting kaibigan. Mas pogi. Ikaw tay, ano bang opinyon mo?
Pero utang na loob lang tay, wag na wag kang sasagot. Ayaw kong hamunin kang magparamdam o magpakita. Tulad mo e okatokat din ako sa mga di dapat ginagambala.
Pero tay isa lang naman ang gusto kong sabihin: salamat. Salamat sa pagmamahal. Salamat sa aruga. Salamat sa pagiging unang modelo ko kung pano maging ama at lalaki na may pasan na responsibilidad sa loob ng tahanan. Salamat sa panggugupit ng buhok ko nung bata pa ako na wala akong kalaban-laban. Salamat sa mga palo. Salamat sa mga kwento mong lasang karne ng manok ang palakang bukid.
Salamat.
Nakakainis ka nga lang brad. Andaya mo kasi, uuna-una ka. Hehe joke lang naman boss..
Sana sa ibang buhay ay ako naman ang erpats mo. Para ako naman ang gugupit sayo ng crewcut para ikaw naman ang lumuluha habang nagmamakaawa na nagsasabing ‘(singhot ng naghalong uhog at laway) tay barbers, yung syete, TAY BARBERS, YUNG SYETE!! (hagulhol)’
Hehehe
Tay wag kang magagalit ha, katuwaan lang XD kanpai!
Pasyalan namin ni nanay at tatay noong dekada nobenta.
Mula Baesa sasakay kami ng jeepney pa-Monumento. Exciting adventure na yun para sa akin.
Pero syempre sa toy store ako mas excited 😁. Pero dahil kadalasan walang pera, window shopping lang. Chicken mami lang sa ground floor sa food court solve na. Minsan kapag may pera, sa G&W naman para makakain ng cheese burjer.
Tapos dinadala ako ni tatay sa sinehan kaya napanood ko rin mga paborito nya: Isang Bala ka Lang, Batas ng 45, atbp ni Da King. Tapos yung Miss na Miss Kita ni Binoy tsaka ni Vina Morales. Gandang ganda ako kay Vina nun, lalo nung mas maliit pa muscles nya kumpara sa muscles ng mga leading man nya.
Bwisit. Bat kaya may nagtatadtad ng sibuyas e gabing gabi na. Dapat isama na rin yan sa mga ordinansa na bawal maghiwa ng sibuyas sa gabi…
Instead of squeezing herself into crowded shopping places during the Christmas season, she just shopped online and bought herself some soft loose long pants.
“Do I look good? This is so comfortable.” she asked me as she tried them on when her parcel arrived.
“Yep, you do.” I responded. “Seems like you’ll be doing some kung-fu fighting, Hooh hah! “
Those who are wishing for someone who can understand isn’t really asking for someone who can relate to them and knows all the right words to tell them EVERYTIME ALL THE TIME. What they were only asking for is someone who cares to understand them when it matters most.
Gen X and Millennials like myself were handed with a priceless inheritance from our forefathers: we were taught what to check in a thermos before paying for it.
“You should be able to hear the sea when you put your ears on the opening of the empty thermos…”
Back then, I treated this matter-of-factly; something ordinary everyday stuff like saying “tabi tabi po” (excuse me) to a tree, open lot, or anywhere except in restroom, just before you take a leak. (It’s believed to be a courtesy call to whoever or whatever is residing therein. Failure to do so will get “them” upset, and people will often say you won’t like it when “they’re” angry).
Now, I’m wondering what’s the science behind the supposed hearing the “sound of the sea” when the thermos is ok. Acoustics? Quantum mechanics? Anyone?
And if it’s broken, I can’t help but think I’d be expecting a grunt and a whisper from someone, or something saying I’m just wasting my hard earned money on this one…
Perhaps the reason we didn’t find each other perfectly whole and intact is because our brokenness and jagged edges were meant to make us a perfect fit…
Tatay, by nature, wasn’t the type to say the SOAB or PI words out of nowhere. But while he may not have been as fluent in expletives as old people were, he sure came up with (ok, amassed might be the appropriate term) witty ways to verbalize contempt, surprise, or amusement.
“Nagbangad ka…”
Bolos or machetes have two edges, one is sharp and the other is not. And the not sharp flat edge is called the “bangad“. He used to tell it to me and my brother when he’s upset. On how the hell did that become a word of contempt however, is completely beyond me.
(It’s only now that I realized – did the old man mean that me and my brother in those instances we’re kind of…dull?!)
“Paliwawəng!”
I have no idea on the etymology of this one. All I know is it sounds funny and a bit of a tongue twister.
“Duggung!”
This one’s my favorite. Duggung by the way is the term for booger. The way he said this though, is very comic and isn’t offensive, to me at least. Imagine a word of contempt as gross as a booger can be that hilarious!
PS:
“Ta oshang nan!..”
Whether this is a euphemism just like the song ‘you touched my TRALALA, my DING DING DONG’ and wherever the heck Tatay heard this one is still a mystery to me.
Can anyone reading this care to shed some light on how did the word oshang came to be? Thanks in advance…
Thank God you’ve finally become but a fond memory. The strong feelings are gone and I can finally just look at you at a distance without feeling upset, nor expecting and imposing anything on you.
I’m finally free. And I’m also finally at the perfect starting point of loving you for a long long time.
Finally, I can smile at you with a genuine smile. A smile that indicates a genuine love and interest in you, and not a smile of looking at you thinking what can I get out of you.
I thank God that I finally reached the state where I can give you the love that I always wanted to give you.
I know you would’ve preferred to keep your peace; that your peace is worth more than a thousand wars; and to say “this too shall pass” and just walk away like the way that you used to.
But you stood your ground and never backed down, as you stirred the hornet’s nest in a way they never expected of you.
It’s the day when you told yourself “not this time” as you decided you will not tolerate any more of the disrespect that they’re serving you.
And you’ve won.
The army that insulted your soul retreated with their most humiliating defeat, as they swallowed and gagged with their bitter pills .
And while you’ve dealt with all these chaos silently without drama (like the way that you used to) know that I saw it all and I’m proud of you.
You were never wrong for standing your ground. You were never wrong for not turning the other cheek. And you were never wrong for not backing down.
While you thought nobody saw all that you have to go through, I did. And for that, not that I figured you needed it or something, you will always have my snappiest salute.
(Nung magbubuhos pa lang ng floor slab…) Engineer kausap ang tigasilip at mason: Sigurado kayo naka level yan? Tigasilip: Oo sir di sasablay instrumento dyan! Mason: Lebel na yan ser tadtad na ng tansi yan!
(Nung naglatag na ng tiles…) Engineer: Sigurado naka level na yan? Mason: Kalahating pulgada pinakamanipis ser tapos dalawang pulgada naman banda dun ang hinabol ko. Pero sure ball na yan ser lebel na yan.
Nung nag flood test, lahat dinaanan ng tubig pwera yung drain; di pa umabot ng 90 degrees yung bukas ng pinto, sumabit na.
Getting exactly what you paid for is really just fair and not like you got swindled or something. What’s considered a con act is when you are shortchanged or when you get more than what you pay for which is a form of corruption.
True love isn’t just in celebrating each other’s beautiful souls as one of God’s greatest gifts to one another; it is also in cultivating deep trust and friendship between our demons as they both dance in harmony and perfect rhythm.
I wouldn’t be surprised if Cobain (Kurt Cobain, Nirvana) and Vedder’s (Eddie Vedder, Pearl Jam) music genre came from a famous and kickass French mathematician Lagrange (Joseph Louis Lagrange), which is widely known as La “Grunge”.
Design engineers kami noon ng ABS-CBN para sa kanilang mga communication towers sa dati kong kumpanya. Dahil dito ay madalas sina Brader Louie at Angkallu (Mark) sa engineering office sa loob mismo ng compound ng ABS-CBN. Normal na pangyayari na para sa kanila ang makakita ng mga artistang kapamilya. Katunayan ay nakasama na nilang magpalitrato si Karylle at si Vice Ganda.
Isang gabi ay nadatnan kami nina Angkallu at ni Brader Louie sa opisina galing ABS. Parehas silang di mapigilan ang pagtawa.
“Alam nyo ba si Brader Louie,” bungad sa amin ni Angkallu habang hirap na hirap niyang pinipigilan ang paghagalpak.
“Gago ka sir Mark,” natatawang umiiling-iling nalang si Brader.
“Sabi ni Brader sakin,” pilit pinipigilan ni Angkallu ang pagtawa para magkwento “ ‘sir Mark, sir Mark nakita ko si Anne Cortez!’ SINO SINO?! Sabi ko kay Brader, SI ANNE CORTEZ?! YUNG ANAK NI REZ CORTEZ?!”
Nanlambot kaming lahat sa kakatawa hanggang sa sumakit ang mga tyan at nangilid ang mga luha namin.
Love a writer and you’ll never die You’ll find yourself in rivers oceans and trees and all across the sky You’ll hear your name ever whispered in the breeze and carried around the world into the open seas
In a way, tall buildings can be referred to as dicks; and structural engineers, architects, and builders are always contending on who conceptualized and erected the longest (tallest) and biggest “dicks”.
Of course it’s implied that the ones who have the biggest “dicks” under them are the most prestigious and most revered.
Compassion and the lack of which, are what defines a “live and let live” and “live and let die” atmosphere.
Yes, there’s a huge difference!
The first one is nurtured in trust and freedom to explore and learn under a protective cover. The other is just wishing you’d screw up so bad or deliberately settling you up for a spectacular failure so they can “officially” get rid of you.
May we dedicate a whole minute today to thank all the angels in the outfield that God sent my way they came through God’s guidance at exactly the right time and instance, for they appeared not with what we anticipated that we may be humbled and our hearts be stripped of arrogance and filled with pride be humiliated
Don’t go around town murdering people’s potential interests like an arsehole
Don’t be like the great Angkol and Manong Paquins
He scorns people and kids who
plays awkward basketball
the quiet and the shy
attempts to explore a new game
tries to be good at something but frequently fails because of his lack of experience
“They need to learn to be tough and resilient, to not give up and go through criticisms both destructive and constructive.” As such is his heavenly wisdom.
Angkol and Manong Paquin believes he’s right!
But Angkol and Manong Paquin has a choice and a chance: either to build someone’s confidence or to ruin them for good before they even began. He chose the former, bright Angkol Paquin he really was.
Don’t be like Angkol Paquin calloused and cold and thinking he’s cool yet thinking on his feet the freakin Angkol and Manong Paquin Sheet
Success in teaching/mentoring isn’t just leaving a grand legacy that endures and bears your name. It’s also in being able to give one single soul a tiny spark that will ignite his lifetime quest to discover his gifts and to understand himself.
Kakaiba talaga kapag magpapasko, nagiging busy ang mga tao. Napapadalas ang carolling, mga nagso-solicit, nagpapahulugan ng kung anu-ano, at nanghihingi ng abuloy (eto medyo pilit pero sige, pagbigyan na natin…)
Bukod pa dun, nagiging mas candid ang mga tao. Yung tipong angkol, anti, ateng, at kuyang ang turing nila sa lahat. Kaya siguro habang nagta “tao po!!!” yung iba e halos ilusot na nila yung mga ulo nila sa gate.
And experience ang magsasabi sayo na iba yung tumitingin lang sa tingin na di mapakali at parang may hinahanap na di mo maintindihan.
“Huwag maging judgmental“, I totally agree. Pero wag din masyadong magpakakampante thinking na parehas mo ang lahat na nag-iisip ng kabutihan lalo na ngayong kapaskuhan.
And never ignore your gut feel, lalo na kung maraming beses mo ng napatunayan na tama ang hinala mo.
(Bato bato sa langit, ang matamaan magkaka anglit…)
As future mentors, let us strive to create a platform/environment where all can have equal access to learning without fear of getting ridiculed, scorned, and treated with contempt because of prejudices, academic background, previous experiences, or professional affiliations (or the lack thereof.)
While we learned to be strong and wise in harsh and toxic work environments, it’s the nurturing ones where our souls thrive and flourish.
Let us then become mentors like oases; a place of hope, a place of nourishment and refreshment in a parched wasteland of divisive and toxic work cultures.
If man is a firewood whose purpose is to burn in the most efficient way, his woman is a kind of fire with varying heat and intensity. Some men need to be kindled with small to moderate amounts of heat only. And there are men who need heat equivalent to that of plasma to burn like an inferno.
At any case, we are going to be gun-damned burned, and it’s always the woman who will see to it that we do. The only difference is the intensity which ranges from the hot coals in a family barbecue to the fiery furnace of hell itself.
But whether we men emerge as pure gold or charred remains after is completely up to us…
Back in the days, socially awkward, shy, and introverts like myself are often despised, bullied, and frequently made fun of. But now, I’m surprised that the same weird people, Wednesday Addams for example, is already celebrated and thought of as cool.
Why the shift of regard from utter disdain to deep respect to such kind of people? Because of her capacity for violence and evil?
We’re lucky (or maybe, our bullies were extremely lucky and we recipients of bullying were not) that we were able to repress our feelings to retaliate with the same amount or even up a notch of violence. Maybe, just maybe, we would’ve been given the same respect then that people now are giving Wednesday Addams.
If life puts you in the dark and you know your light ain’t that bright, maybe you were not meant to be a light at all – maybe you are a mosquito coil meant to drive those parasites away.
I prefer rock and alternative music; she prefers slow and mellow. She’s frequently pissed with my preference for anything loud; I can at most tolerate her liking of sleep-inducing choice of music. But if there is something we both 100% agree with, it’s our mutual disdain of the song Better Days by Dianne Reeves.
Me when I hear it, especially the most annoying parts with frills: “Ta ukin-inanadtan…” (Dafuq is that?!)
If you come to think of it, everyone, yes everyone, is a stoic regardless of whoever the heck you are. Well, sort of.
One of the pillars of Stoicism is to focus on something within your control and to let go of the things that are beyond you.
Take anger for example.
If you’re angry and you cannot control your anger, you are acting only on the thing that you can control which is not anger, obviously. So you’re being stoic.
Same thing with anxiety. Being calm is beyond your control so as a true stoic, you only do what you can do which is to panic and have episodes of anxiety attacks…
No poetry is ever wasted. Ever. For while you offered it to the wrong person, the universe already conspired with the wind for your words to reach the Right One…
It’s amusing to see man as he gets frustrated falling short of his larger-than-life dreams which he sustained with his barely there half-assed efforts.
The one you hail as your savior and hero, is the same person someone calls Mephistopheles’ kin.
While you were gifted with favors, the others were blessed with utter disdain, unfounded contempt, and untold misery by the same person they call bitch/dickhead.
So before you condemn others’ judgement of who you highly look up to, remember this: WE WERE NOT ALL TREATED THE SAME.
Some people don’t crave for the existence of a multiverse as a tangible reality in as much as a place where they hope to live with the choices they never got to make.
If he allows you to change him for the better. Change is painful, it’s like getting stabbed in the ego over and over again. But if he allowed you to nonetheless, it means you’re worth every stab wound and every drop of blood.
When you desire something or someone and you can’t choose them and you get upset of your current circumstances, but you wouldn’t have met those opportunities in the first place had it not been for the circumstances that led you to them.
The one particular time of the year when we are more prayerful is between mid November up to around first week of January the following year. It is when there are videokes left and right in the neighborhood that gives us our undeserved affliction up to midnight and beyond inspite of local ordinances regulating it. We always pray for heavy rains enough to immediately shut them up and make them quit so we can all sleep in peace.
In everything else, the gray matter is the most formidable opponent. But when faced with his blood pumping nemesis, he’ll always be just another certified lousy ass fighter.
She chooses to look at what is, he has his eyes at what he wants to see The way they keep it together comes from sorcery greater than what holds blackholes and intergalactic mysteries
If you want proof that I’m thinking of you, look no further: see the sun the rain and the song all around – you can hear their sweet whispers of your name, the most wonderful sound
If you’re feeling sad, just remember that you had been an inspiration in someone else’s poetry, letter, or diary. It might be a hate poetry, or a curse but you were the writer’s inspiration nonetheless.
Similar to the evolution of a writer’s perspective on life, most people undergo:
Stage 1. The age of angst. Towards everything and everyone. Nothing is right and the only way to respond is through anger.
Stage 2. Seriously serious. We’re no longer angry all the time but we are serious about everything.
Stage 3. Life is a comic relief. Life still ain’t perfect, and it still sucks to be alive at times. But instead of getting angry and being dead serious on things that we cannot do anything about, we choose to laugh at them instead of getting upset.
If you’re still at stage 1 or 2, don’t worry, evolution will take place and it’ll eventually take you to stage 3. Life still won’t be easy by then but it’ll be more fun with a comic mindset.
Of course it’s possible, being dead serious with your dreams while laughing on your way to them, that is.
Empowering the bold and the articulate are telltale signs of a good leader.
Great leaders on the other hand, are those who can inspire transformation into an “ordinary” junior making them surpass their perceived limitations through proper guidance, motivation and mentoring and thus achieving extraordinary feats.
Boss and I were doing some last minute cleaning before calling it a day. I was cleaning the kitchen when she came across the filthy containers of salt, MSG, and oil.
She told me in a very serious voice that I should be responsible for cleaning the containers, that their contents are a part of our food, yadda yadda yadda.
I jokingly told her that what’s important is what’s inside (the containers) and not the outside appearance.
Judging from the way she looked at me, I suddenly realized that I still don’t want to die…
How hard can it be to just say hi and how are we than to sulk here telling the sun, the stars, and moon the wind and the storm and the incoming monsoon of all things about you what a pity that they knew more of what I feel for you than you currently do…
Weeks of silence I don’t know how you’re doing I may want to know but not all that much so I mean I can’t even if I’m dying to We chose silence than be consumed with all the feelings I wish you were too so you can share my torment
It’s time to free ourselves from our previous coping mechanisms.
I know, we clung to them in the hope of staying alive while hanging on to something, anything that resembles hope. It probably was necessary.
And the fact that we are still here continuously slugging it out means it did serve its purpose.
But the strategies and plans that sustained and eventually won the war won’t be the best plan moving forward.
And here’s the thing: our experiences that are threatening our feelings, our egos, our being – most of them were already gone or are already powerless before our wiser and bigger selves.
The coping mechanisms that we developed may no longer be necessary.
The threats are long gone, but the illusion that they are as formidable as they were remains. And it’s the illusion of still being under siege by them and the fear and doubt that they instilled are the REAL things that we need to overcome.
At its lowest, sex is nothing but a biological urge, a mere satisfying of lower fleshly desires.
Sex at its highest is a prayer and meditation.
Sex at its highest is communion with God & Goddess.
Sex at its highest is the meeting of the Universal soul.
Sex at its highest is the dissolving into the ocean of the infinite. Sex at its highest is no longer just sex.
At its highest, sex is the bonding together of two individuals, who are merging their energies into one divine movement and vibrating on the same frequency.
Sex at its highest is the finding and the maintaining of the same wave length within two individuals, because it’s the coming together of opposite polarities forming a complete circuit.
Sex at its highest is the ecstatic uniting of the God and Goddess within Self, in both.
Sex is a Sacred Energy Exchange of Magnetic and Energetic Energies.
May all learn to honour it and keep it sacred for their Beloved.
Please be mindful who you share energies with.
When a man enters your womb, what type of energy and consciousness does he have?
Is he bitter, is he happy, does he love himself, does he love you? Is he a positive or negative thinker?
When a woman makes love to you is she blessing you or cursing you?
Is she bitter, is she happy, does she love herself, does she love you? Is she a positive or negative thinker?
Sex is a ritual of exchanging DNA, Energies, Thoughts, Emotions and Spirits.
During sex, you become a spiritual sponge for the consciousness and energy of that other person.
Each pump and each thrust is an affirmation.
Are they draining your life force and your energy or are they recharging healing and re-fueling your spirit?
Are they leading you into un-fulfillment low frequency energy, negativity, depression and destruction, or are they elevating you into a higher frequency of love, life and bliss?
Be mindful of the TRUE POWER OF SEX!
Be mindful and master how your sexual energy is being exchanged, received and returned back to you.
Sex should be healing, powerful, rejuvenating medicine to every part of your being… From a cellular level, to your organs, to your mind state, and to your spirit and soul…
It is not an attitude of pride, but of congruence. You will continue to love them but with another perspective, from another level of understanding, comprehension and awareness. It is the most difficult thing you will have to do in your life, and it will also be the most important: stop being linked to those who are not ready to love you💚💚
Stop having difficult conversations with people who don’t want to change. Stop appearing for people who are indifferent to your presence. Stop giving your love and energy to people who are not ready to love you💚💚
I know that your instinct is to do everything you can to earn the good graces of everyone you can, but it is also that impulse that will steal your time, your energy and your sanity.
When you begin to be in your life completely, with joy, interest and commitment, not everyone will be ready to meet you there. That does not mean you have to change who you are. It means you have to get away from people who are not prepared to be with you.
If you are excluded, subtly insulted, forgotten or easily ignored by the people you spend most of your time with, you are not doing yourself a favor by continuing to offer them your energy and your life.
The truth is that you are not for everyone, and they are not all for you. That is what makes it so special when you find the few people with whom you have a genuine friendship, love or relationship: you will know how precious it is because you have experienced what it’s not.
But the more time you spend trying to force someone to be with you when they are not able, the more time you will be depriving yourself of that same connection. It’s waiting for you. There are billions of people on this planet, and many of them will meet you at their level, with the vibration of where they are, connect with where they are going.
…But the longer you stay involved in the familiarity of people who use you as a cushion, a background option, a therapist and a strategist for their emotional work, the longer you stay out of the community you crave.
“Maybe if you stop showing up, you’ll be less loved.”
“Maybe they forget you completely.”
“Maybe if you stop trying, the relationship will end.”
“Maybe if you stop sending text messages, your phone will remain dark for days and weeks.”
“Maybe if you stop loving someone, the love between you will dissolve.”
That doesn’t mean you ruined a relationship. It means that the only thing that sustained the relationship was the energy that you and only you put into it. That’s not love…that is attachment!
The most precious and important thing you have in your life is your energy. It is not your time that is limited, it is your energy. What you give to each day is what will create more and more in your life. What you give your time is what will define your existence. When you realize this, you will begin to understand why you are so anxious when you spend your time with people who do not contribute to you, and in jobs or places or cities that do not suit you.
You will begin to realize that the most important thing you can do for your life, for yourself and for everyone you know is to protect your energy more fiercely than anything else.
Make your life a safe haven where only people who can care, listen and connect with you are allowed.
You are not responsible for saving people.
You are not responsible for convincing them that they want to be saved. It is not your job to appear for people and give them your life, little by little, moment by moment, because you feel sorry for them, because you feel bad, because you “should”, because you are obligated. At the root of all this, you are afraid that they will not return the favor. THAT is not to love… to love is to release those you love and those that are not ready to be with you so they live what they have to live while you move on to find someone with whom you’ll be able to share the reciprocity of healthy love. It is another level of consciousness.
It is your job to realize that you are the master and lover of your destiny, and that you are accepting the love that you think you deserve.
Decide that you deserve a real friendship, a true commitment and a complete love with people who are healthy and prosperous and who compliment your state of being.
Then, go within, allow yourself to BE the love you are seeking … And look how quickly everything starts to change.
Inasmuch as we men have “off” days that are awfully so easy to understand, I believe that women with their “toyo” days of unpredictability is not an enigma nor a scientific phenomenon to be explained, much more understood (hell, you’ll be long dead and you still won’t figure it out!).
Instead, it is something that you just have to accept, bear with, and enjoy. After all, it is something that makes her herself. She’s a queen and that’s her crown. Just let her majesty be.
Looking back at old articles/writeups can indeed elicit a few laughs.
And not only that, it can also trigger a lot more reactions such as, but not limited to:
Denial (Hell no, I didn’t write this shit right here!)
Disbelief (The fuck, did I really write this shit right here?!)
Cringe (No no no no, that shit wasn’t mine, bro! with arms raised in horror)
What’s good with time and maturity that matured through time (if that makes sense) is that, these other reactions will be nothing but a memory that’s destined to tickle the funny bone of authors and readers alike. We are all humans anyway: fellas on top of the food chain who undergo basically the same shit as everyone except for the varying circumstances that come with it.
But a trip down Memory blog Lane is also a good reminder to the times when the writer in us was totally overwhelmed and found a quick refuge by bleeding on paper. The readers might never know and much more feel the grasping at straws that we went through just to be able to surface and breathe from something that is trying to drown us. The fear, anger, and strong feelings that we desperately tried to nail on paper hoping it would stay there forever after it was made tangible through written words.
While some may find it a funny anecdote, a fancy poetry, or a nonsense prose, we were in those instances just trying to go through the uncertainty, the Pandora’s box of unprocessed feelings, and pain just to make it to the next minute, hours, or days still there and breathing.
We both evolved different ways to cope with life – until we found each other, had each other, kept each other. We are each other’s evolution of what it takes to weather the storm called life painting our lips with smiles and making the quick journey worth our while.
If you’re a senior, manager, team leader, or a director and your subordinate resigns, make sure that one of her reasons for leaving is she’s already empowered to test her new and more efficient skills that you helped her hone, and not because you gave her a taste of what it feels like to live in hell that left her questioning her self worth.
Most of the time, someone leaves because of someone. Be one of the reasons why people would want to stay.
It’s a wonder how people manage to sing and dance heartily to the dissonant tune between their souls and the life they’re living as if they’re in perfect harmony.
One probable reason why some things and people weren’t meant to be is because God knows that you will not be able to grow to your full potential if you end up with who you think you want instead of who you were meant to be with.
Sex and intimacy with the one you want is great, of course. But your life won’t consist of sex and intimacy only. You have dreams to turn into reality, habits that need to be ditched, passions to be honed, and the moral obligation to add value to the world by being your best self.
Sure you want them so bad. Unfortunately, they may not be the one who can help you unlock the best version of you.
There are times when you feel like a complete idiot, especially when you are not on your turf. Do note that it’s just natural to feel that way. That’s the consequential discomfort as you try to expand your comfort zone.
You are at your most vulnerable, and almost everything is aimed to fuel your insecurities and to break you down. And it seems like everyone is looking forward to seeing a failure on his knees and you can picture them jeering, and making fun of you. Nothing seems much more awful than being someone so odd and out of place.
But you will bounce back.
You will come out stronger, bigger, better, wits and confidence oozing but sans the arrogance. They will then see the badass man without the need for you to tell it to anyone.
You will be ok.
Embrace the suck.
Close your eyes and pray. Work on your shit everyday like your very breathing depends on it.
When do you know that your madness is finally over? It’s kind of annoying actually. You wake up in the morning thinking of her, dreaming of something beautiful that could’ve been. And then in the middle of the day you just felt like you no longer have romantic feelings for her anymore. But by just thinking of her, your feelings like dying embers are once again set ablaze to a fiery inferno. You no longer understand yourself again. You are frustrated again. You dream again.
That's maybe the closest we'll ever get...
Maybe the only date we'll ever have...
Maybe the only time I'd see a real time smile of yours...
Maybe the only time that our eyes met...
That fleeting time...
Maybe was the only time we had...
Maybe...
Or maybe...
… someday we'll get closer and closer
… someday we'll finally have our date – everyday forever
… someday I'd be seeing a real time you every second, minute, and hour
… someday we'll be looking at each other's eyes in every moonlit night
That fleeting time...
Maybe the forever that we'll eventually find...
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